


A Fungal Heartbeat

by kirbapy



Category: Bug Fables (Video Game)
Genre: Achillean, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Bug Fables Spoilers, Character Study, Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gay Male Character, Gay Nonbinary Character, He/They Leif, Intimacy, Kissing, LGBTQ Themes, Leif Uses I, Leif Uses I and We, Leif's request spoilers, M/M, Making Out, Mild canon divergence, NBLM, No Smut, Non-Canon Queer Characters, Non-Canon Relationship, Nonbinary Character, One Shot, Other, They/Them Leif, headcanons, mlm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:35:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25971439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirbapy/pseuds/kirbapy
Summary: Leif and Kabbu were having a normal, soft night of kissing and laughter--until Kabbu notices thumping, which is most definitely not a heartbeat, against Leif's chest, stomach, and whole torso area. The oddest part is...it seems to be excited. They sit down and talk about Leif. His thoughts on who, how, and just what he is--what they are.
Relationships: Kabbu/Leif (Bug Fables)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 30





	A Fungal Heartbeat

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thank you for reading! Please note this has MAJOR SPOILERS FOR BUG FABLES REGARDING LEIF, HIS CHARACTER, BACKSTORY, ETC. There is a CW for:  
> DEATH MENTIONS AND DISCUSSION (Canonical and related to Leif, no new character death, no discussion or talk of grief, it is not suffering death, you will know what I am talking about if you have played these parts of the game, I'm just being vague to not spoil). THIS IS CANON COMPLIANT AND HAPPENS IN GAME!  
> MINOR BODY HORROR OR UNCOMFORTABLE BODILY ACTIONS (Less than what happens in game/less graphic than in game, not graphic, nothing is out of body, just squirming and movement inside Leif's body that is visible outside of it)  
> UNDEAD/ZOMBIES--THIS IS CANON COMPLIANT! IT IS UNDEAD/ZOMBIES THAT OCCURS IN GAME.  
> FUNGI AND PARASITES (CORDYCEPS)--THIS RELATES TO THE UNDEAD/ZOMBIE CW. IT IS CANON COMPLIANT AND OCCURS IN GAME.  
> Please let me know if I should add a CW for anything else! But really, thanks for checking this out. I really wanted to write about how I interpret Leif and the cordyceps--even if it is a little canon divergent, though not very/it could still be feasible. Don't be afraid to point out anything like spelling mistakes if I made any! Edit: the title was a fungi's heartbeat (which I knew was wrong while posting, but fungus's sounded worse, so I changed to Fungal as of 10/20/20)

Kabbu laughed heartily as Leif pushed up against him on the couch. It was always a joy watching him try to fit and shift his whole body across on top of Kabbu. Their limbs were quite too long and lanky to properly lay across the couch and, along with Kabbu’s body breathing underneath his, Leif had to think very creatively in order to position themselves just right to pin him down and to feel comfortable all the while doing it—Not even to mention just how their wings would manage to sneak in between Kabbu and him in less than desirable ways, whether it be from getting creased between the couch, or trapped underneath Kabbu’s backside.

But still, none of this bothered either of them—It was another thing they both shared smiles over with sparkles of love glinting in their eyes.

Kabbu’s body was spread open underneath Leif’s, his stomach lay bare, wings opened and relaxed, and the cloak he wore over them long since tossed away with no heed by Leif—Although if Kabbu was the one who took it off, he’d have been much more careful to fold it and would have put it in a place where he’d be sure to remember to find it later. Not just some random place on the floor, strewn about in a mess, like how Leif chose to do.

With a hitch from Kabbu’s breath, Leif slid both of his cold, chilled hands under the space where Kabbu’s stomach folded over, sliding them out from the center area before resting them on the edges where his stomach’s crease began with a rather gentle hold, though he didn’t hesitate to give it the occasional squeeze and massage. This resulted in a warmth that tittered through Kabbu’s body.

Any other partner would not usually be able to feel this subtle change in temperature, but for Leif, he could, and they could feel each and every reaction and emotion through the heat that flooded and mingled throughout Kabbu. Whether it be from a chaste kiss or far more devious actions that Leif loved doing (just for the sake of furthering the teasing Kabbu was already subjected to,) Kabbu’s body still burst with a warmth that Leif had grown far too dependent on by now. They had even begun to memorize many of these patterns, recognizing emotions and their intensity just from when, where, and how Kabbu’s body reacted. And luckily for Leif?

Well, no one was more sensitive to temperature than someone with ice magic.

Leif slipped his hands up quickly to Kabbu’s love handles now, squeezing them tighter than they did his stomach, which, much to their pleasure, elicited a squeak from beneath them. He liked it like this—There were no words spoken between either of them, yet the message of their feelings and love was unadulterated and as clear and crisp as winter ice. Right now, both were above words, and both found they even lacked the need. Despite any whines or yelps, Kabbu kept his body open to Leif and his desires, completely vulnerable and with trust that went beyond anything spoken.

With a small chuckle, Leif leaned down to Kabbu’s neck, grazing his teeth lightly against it, pleased to hear him giggle with the motion, though as they began to kiss more, his noises melted into sounds more akin to pleasure. As he kept kissing and marking along Kabbu, Leif kept his thumbs across his stomach and hips, rubbing them along, down, and into the subtle changes and textures that Kabbu’s stomach held, where his stretch marks sprawled across like vines. From there, Leif couldn’t help but give into toying with Kabbu by giving him loving kisses all along his neck, before resorting to harsher bites, which would result in an immediate shout from Kabbu, but very quickly, he softened into the sensation, still leaving himself bare for Leif to be trusted with.

When Leif was satisfied with his handiwork that he left scrawled across Kabbu’s body, they sat up, slipping their hands underneath Kabbu’s arms, before hoisting him up like a rag doll, quickly plopping him down in the crosses of their legs, handling him as they pleased. With a trilling hum, Leif leaned forward, quickly pressing his lips together against each other’s, swift to force Kabbu’s mouth into opening and sliding his tongue in, trying to find and taste Kabbu’s. By now, a subtle thumping sensation began against Leif’s chest, though it became muddled and subdued with the rest of the sensations Leif was letting his body drown in.

What Leif _was_ acutely aware of just how burning Kabbu’s tongue and the inside of his mouth felt to them, and—by the Goddesses—it was a sensation he was obsessed with and couldn’t get enough of. Kabbu would occasionally mention the numbness of cold that his tongue succumbed to during sessions like these, but rather than feel apologetic or any guilt (which Leif seldom did), he felt glad to be able to leave his mark on Kabbu in a way no other bug could.

Leif was eager to savor every moment that he could of Kabbu, so, as such, he rarely parted their mouths, leaving the only window of time for air to be when they would briefly split from the other. As Kabbu began to let down his reserved walls, his noises became less reserved as well, much to his chagrin and Leif’s pleasure. The thrumming in Leif’s chest grew stronger, and along with it, their leg began to bounce slightly against Kabbu, an output for energy and an unfortunate involuntary reaction he had when so close and intimate with another individual.

Kabbu’s hands slid up to Leif’s chest, earning a shudder from them, and that previous drumming sensation began to rise up even more, almost squirming against Leif’s skin. In between his panting, and in between kissing, Kabbu finally broke the silence.

“L-Leif,” Kabbu muttered.

Leif gave a small hum, pressing his lips back to Kabbu’s, biting down on his bottom lip, getting even more into the movement of their actions.

“Leif.” Kabbu’s words still barely reached Leif’s fogged mind, but even then, some part of their brain, somewhere, could hear the subtle change in sternness as Kabbu spoke.

With a groan from Kabbu that Leif soaked up lasciviously (though they failed to realize the noise wasn’t from pleasure alone), he brought a hand up to the back of Kabbu’s head, cupping it and quickly holding onto it tightly. That sensation in Leif’s chest found its peak now, and although still maintaining its rhythm, the way it moved across his body was far more sporadic, pressing against Leif and rubbing into him, creating small rises and bumps that danced across the surface of his skin, though to anyone who was viewing, the appearance would be immediately seen as less poetic and more…Grotesque.

Kabbu’s pressed his hands far more firmly against Leif’s chest now, and with a final muttering of something along the lines of ‘for the love of’ and ‘Gods’, Kabbu pushed with a sudden heave and shout, separating the two of them, practically forcing Leif out of Kabbu’s mouth.

“LEIF! I—Seriously, that is at _least_ the third time I’ve said your name! You need to listen to me!” Kabbu’s face was a little irritated, although he was far from being mad. But then again, with the lines of saliva smeared across his face and heavy breathing, it was hard to take him too seriously as he tried to scold Leif.

Leif would be lying to say that the sudden push didn’t knock the wind out of him a bit, and after recuperating, they sat up slowly, giving a long, lazy blink as they tried to look back up at Kabbu, heavily disoriented from the sudden lack of warmth he had been shoving his tongue down into.

“…Huh?” Leif mumbled, shaking his head to regain his focus.

Kabbu sighed, shaking his head instead in disapproval.

“I’ve tried saying your name several times, Leif, and you didn’t respond. It’s—I needed you to stop. It’s important.” Kabbu’s face shifted gears back into flustered right after he spoke his words.

“Not that I—Not that I _wanted_ you to stop, no, erm, quite the opposite, Heavens, I was enjoying that, and I still want to—to enjoy that more, but, you, erm…” Kabbu took a deep breath, pointing with a shaking hand (less from nerves, more from physical exertion) to Leif’s chest.

Leif looked down along with Kabbu’s point, and their eyes widened.

“I’m more than a little worried about—about _that,_ ” Kabbu admitted with an anxious chuckle.

Leif quickly saw what Kabbu was saying. When he looked down at their chest, his whole chest, torso, _everywhere_ was very clearly squirming and writhing with something underneath it, and it looked like it was about to burst out of him from any moment.

But well—They both knew what that something was, even if in the moment, it was more than a little disconcerting.

Leif jumped back as if to get away, shoving himself up into the arm of the couch and gripped onto the edges of it, still looking down at himself in horror and shock.

“What the…!” Leif started to say, his immediate distress starting to subside, though his confusion remained the same.

“It, err…I think you—you? That part of you is, um…” Kabbu trailed off, tiptoeing around his words carefully. “Squirming?” he provided as a word.

Leif took a deep breath, trying to soothe the knot of anxiety in his chest. And, from the looks of it, the movement, albeit not completely gone, began to calm down a bit. Leif brought a hand up over his heart, taking another breath again. Leif’s head swam with thoughts, though none of them were particularly discernible. Before he spiraled off much longer, Kabbu piped up.

“…Is it you?” Kabbu asked.

Leif took his eyes off his body, looking up at Kabbu’s eyes.

“What?”

“Well, you know…” Kabbu glanced away. “Is it you?”

Leif looked back down at where his hand rested. Was it him?

“I…Yes,” he answered. “It—” Leif stopped his words to correct himself. “They are part of me. We are them. Sorta.”

Kabbu gave a slow nod, inching a little closer to Leif, unable to hide his curiosity and interested gaze.

“Does it hurt?” he asked.

“…No,” Leif answered, a little uncomfortable at such a _thing_ moving around in him, even if, in a way, he was it, and a little uncomfortable to be in such a vulnerable position, having such a thing about him looked at. Kabbu let out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding in.

“Good,” he said, slumping his shoulders. “I was worried. If, I’ll erm, be honest…I thought it must have been your heartbeat, when I felt it at first. But then I realized, well…” Kabbu looked away awkwardly, biting down on his lip to avoid saying it.

“You realized we wouldn’t have one,” Leif supplied.

“Yes.”

Kabbu shifted a little, rubbing his fingers over his knees for a moment before speaking again.

“If—If I’m to be honest, which I will be,” Kabbu started. “I think it…they—you? Were excited. The…Cordyceps, itself. Acting almost like an intensified heartbeat would. It…It didn’t feel like it was something that was going to hurt me or, well, hurt your body. What I truly felt when I began to realize the sensation was…I felt the communication of excitement.”

As if in response, Leif felt a gentle thump against his chest. They all sat in silence for the following moment, until Leif decide to open his body a bit, gesturing for Kabbu to come closer. Kabbu did just that, moving up into Leif’s lap with his back facing them, before Leif brought his wings up and wrapped them around Kabbu.

“We’re not usually one for, well, talking about such things, but…May we talk about it? There’s…There’s some things, that we’ve been thinking about that we can’t just ignore.” Kabbu gave a happy hum, rubbing gently against him.

“I would love nothing more than to listen, Leif,” Kabbu smiled, closing his eyes as he relaxed into Leif’s body. Well, as well as one could, what with the movement that still ran underneath the surface of Leif’s skin. Leif took a deep breath, wrapping his arms around Kabbu’s torso before leaning their chin down onto his shoulder.

“We are Leif,” they began.

Kabbu nodded. “Yes, that you are.”

“We… _I_ am Leif, too,” he continued.

Kabbu paused for a moment this time, but he gave another nod, just as sure as the last one. “Yes,” he said.

“And…Besides the part of us that is fungi, no matter what, we _are_ dead. Or undead. We believe that…Who we are, our—our soul, is still alive, in a way. If that is how such things work.”

Kabbu gave a light chuckle.

“Why, that’s the most spiritual thing I think I’ve ever heard you say.”

With a bit of irritation, Leif whacked the back of Kabbu’s head lightly, resulting in an immediate sound of surprise, before Kabbu sighed and grumbled it off.

“If you make more jesting comments like that, we might just have to stop talking,” Leif warned.

Kabbu’s shoulders fell a bit. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

It was Leif’s turn to chuckle, and he brought a hand up through his wing-cape to pat Kabbu’s head.

“We’re just teasing. Which is odd that we even have the nerve to do such a thing in a time like this.”

“Well,” Kabbu said. “Even when we have all quite literally been in mortal danger—you—and Vi—have all managed to find time and a way to poke fun at my expense.”

Leif brought his head down into Kabbu’s neck, nuzzling happily into it.

“Yes,” they said. “And we love you.” Kabbu gave a small laugh, opening his neck to Leif.

“I know,” he muttered. “And I love you too. But don’t let that keep you from talking to me.” Leif grumbled, but gave a small nod where he rested their head, before lifting it up again.

“Even…Despite me, erm…Clearly having issues with that what is inside me a few moments ago, and the real proof that…That is there, sustaining my body and—and the remnants of my life and memories…We no longer have any doubt that I am the same Leif from nearly a century or so ago.”

Kabbu grabbed one of Leif’s hands that rest on his waist before slipping his own hand into it.

“And…How can you be so sure? If—If you really did die, then…”

Kabbu could tell how Leif’s breath hitched for a moment and stuck in his chest, and he could tell how his hand tightened its grip against Kabbu’s.

“Because we have no room for any doubt, Kabbu. We are Leif, and _I_ am Leif. To say otherwise…We don’t have enough time to live in that world where it isn’t true. Even if we _were_ truly and completely dead by the time…the cordyceps came along…my soul was revived in this vessel of mine.” Leif’s grip on Kabbu’s hand grew tighter and tighter still.

“Perhaps we now live with two souls in our body—The cordyceps…and me, the moth, Leif. Their home is in my body, and my body is in its life, otherwise I would no longer be of this world. But I know that we are Leif—and in the same way that you are a beetle, a heartbeat, a horn and a soul, we are a moth, a lack thereof, a cordyceps and a soul.”

Kabbu gave an audible breath before responding, but he squeezed reciprocally onto Leif’s hand.

“Yes. If that is what you think—you _believe_ , then that is how it is, Leif. You are the only one who has answers to any of this, yes? And…I’m sure you’ve spent plenty time thinking on it.” Kabbu chuckled a little. “Perhaps _too_ much time. And…I think that maybe, even if you didn’t know it, while in Snakemouth…you, as Leif, had already ruminated some on the matter of who _you_ are.” Leif nodded along with Kabbu in agreement.

“If I one day became, well…a zombie, out of nowhere, I’d still be me, wouldn’t I?” Kabbu began, rubbing his thumb across the back of Leif’s hand. “Regardless of if I was dead and then brought back to being ‘undead’, or if there was only a moment of life, then undead, I’d still be me. I’d still be Kabbu. My thoughts and consciousness are all the same—My _soul_ is all the same, like you said. But I’d just be, well, dead, wouldn’t I? The parasite that is keeping me in such a state of suspension—Well, it isn’t such a parasite, is it? Even if it caused my death in this scenario…It’d be symbiotic by now.”

Leif hummed.

“And in our case, although I still don’t know if I was alive or dead by the time the cordyceps found my body, our soul has not passed onto another life quite yet. The cordyceps made sure of that.” Leif let out a sigh, looking up to the ceiling—not like there was anything there. “And although yes, we miss those in the past, we are more than grateful for this chance to finish out our lifespan along with you, Kabbu. We think it was meant to be—If it wasn’t for the cordyceps, We wouldn’t have been able to meet our soulmate, and I would have been very, very old, or dead, even, by the time you were even born.” Kabbu laughed giddily at that, pulling up Leif’s hand up to his cheek, using it to cup it.

“Oh, hush. You know, perhaps you _are_ an old man, when you speak of such things like that.”

With a growl from Leif, they pulled back their hand slightly, just enough to give Kabbu a gentle slap to the face.

“Be quiet, Kabs. We already hear enough jokes about being an old man from Vi alone. We don’t need it from our partner, either.” Kabbu didn’t have time to stay irritated from the dull sting against his cheek and began to speak again.

“I know, I know. But I just couldn’t resist.”

Leif let out a sigh, slumping their body against the couch and laying down slightly, pulling Kabbu back into them.

“We—We think that the cordyceps, in a way, is also me. I mean—your heart is part of you, yes? The cordyceps— _my_ cordyceps is part of me. It sustains our ‘life’, and we…we think that it wants the same things that I want. Even if our souls combined into one, somehow, I’m Leif, and our cordyceps…is our cordyceps. We aren’t sure, but perhaps it has some form of sentience of its own.”

Kabbu nodded, leaning his head against Leif’s chest and laying it down. “I think so, too. Why else would they have squirmed like that, so excited to be—” Kabbu cleared his throat, a small bit of heat spreading across his cheeks, which Leif has more than happy to feel. “—so excited to be making out with me?”

Kabbu wasn’t sure, but he swore he could feel another bit of gentle squirming against Leif’s chest.

“Mhmm,” Leif mumbled. “When we think back to the _me_ from however long ago…We know that if asked such a bizarre question about what you would be if you became a zombie, what would happen to _you_ , your soul, etc…Well, we would have thought it’d still be us, and we know this because that _was_ me. The only thing different is we have grown as a person.”

Kabbu shifted a little, giving a pleasant buzz from his throat, snuggling up against Leif.

“And what about we?” Kabbu asked. “I—I mean, why do you use we? I’ve always assumed it was because of how it felt practically royal, but then, because you really _are_ a ‘we’, but, at the same time, you are also an ‘I’, and I know that, sometimes, depending on situation, context, or comfort, you seem to switch between the two.” 

Leif sat quiet for a moment in thought, before reaching his answer.

“Well, when we…‘woke up’, per se, it was what felt natural. We don’t remember if we used it before we died, but part of me suspects I might have—Although we do not know the reasons. But yes, like just now, we do use ‘I’ occasionally. Sometimes, it is because in that context or situation, yes, it truly is ‘I’, but other times…it is like a form of rebellion in just a single letter. Reclaiming who we are—who _Leif_ is, and saying that’s who _I_ am. But also?” Leif gave a quick chuckle.

“It’s cool as hell to refer to yourself as ‘we’, ain’t it?”

Kabbu groaned, turning around only to gently hit Leif’s chest with his fists.

“Leif! You _know_ how I feel about such foul language!”

Leif rolled their eyes.

“Yeah, whatever. We know. That’s not even a bad word—it’s just a place. In theory.”

Kabbu huffed.

“Yes, well—”

Leif interrupted him. “C’mon, don’t you find it a little hot when you hear Mr. Aloof-Never-Shows-Emotions-Leif say something a little bad? When you hear such words come from our mouth despite your ingrained reserved-ness?”

Kabbu went silent.

“I…I’m not even sure how you got to that conclusion.”

Leif smirked.

“Well, are we right?”

Kabbu gave that question another bout of silence as well.

“Heh, thought as much.” Leif tried getting a little more comfortable, but he had trouble adjusting himself to be so.

“Erm…Kabbu?” Leif asked.

“Yes, my love?”

“You…don’t mind that we’re dead, right? That—That we’re a literal zombie?”

Before Leif could let himself dwell on their anxieties waiting for an answer, Kabbu quickly began to laugh. He held at his stomach, clearly trying to stop himself.

“Sorry, sorry, I-I’m not trying to laugh, it’s just—that’s such a silly question!” Leif tilted his head in confusion, and Kabbu’s laughter subsided just a little.

“It’s such a silly question because of _course_ I don’t mind, Leif,” Kabbu clarified. “I don’t care in the slightest. Even if you looked more like a zombie like the…rest of what we’ve seen,” Kabbu said, shuddering a little at that part. “I’d still be in love with you. By the Gods, I would still be so, so madly in love with you. You know that, right? That I love you no matter what? Because I do. What sort of man would I be if I did not love you unconditionally? A terrible one, that’s what.” Kabbu gave a small humph.

And at that, Leif couldn’t help but let a genuine smile grace across his lips.

“Haha, well, just like how you said you should love unconditionally, we love you unconditionally, too.” Leif chuckled, planting a kiss onto the top of Kabbu’s head. “Even if you _were_ the most terrible little bug out there, we’d still love you. We just might have to stop whatever evil things you’re doing first. Then we could settle out how we’d kiss each other.”

Kabbu smiled warmly at that, rubbing his face to Leif’s chest once more. He knew that Leif didn’t _literally_ have a weight on his chest, but from the way his whole body was much more relaxed now, it was almost like he did. Kabbu was more than joyful at that notion, happy to know Leif had finally gotten to talk about all that. He couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to be in Leif’s situation, nor have a fungus inside of his body, keeping him alive—or undead, rather. He just never expected that the topic would spring up like it did, and quite literally so with how the cordyceps had probed up against Leif’s body.

Even now, Kabbu thought he felt the occasional thrum from Leif’s chest.

It was like he had his own little heartbeat.

Both of them let out gentle sighs of exhaustion. Kabbu curled up against Leif, and Leif did so around Kabbu. With a small stretch, Kabbu yawned, letting his eyelids drift downwards until they drooped completely into being closed.

“Hey,” Leif said. “Thank you.”

Kabbu didn’t move a muscle to answer. “For what?”

“For—For being there. For listening. For accepting me. You know. All that mushy stuff.”

Kabbu chuckled.

“Of course.”

Leif let their own eyelids drift lazily until they shut, giving a pleased hum when he was finally content.

“There will be more time for us to kiss in the morning, right? And then some?” Leif asked.

Leif could feel Kabbu’s smile against his chest.

“Yes, of course. And then some.”

“Mm, good,” Leif said. “We’re glad to be able to drift off to sleep like this, with you in our wings, even if this isn’t how we planned the night to go.”

Kabbu gave a mumble, clearly getting a little too tired to keep answering Leif’s words.

“Kabbu?” Leif asked. “Just one last thing.”

Kabbu grumbled, before getting his voice to be loud enough to speak.

“What is it?” Kabbu asked back.

“I love you.”

Now with that, Leif could really feel a jolt practically go through Kabbu’s body. Kabbu was grinning now against Leif.

“I love you, too. Goodnight, Leif.”

Leif gave Kabbu a gentle squeeze, feeling a vibration go through his chest. And the last thing that Leif ever wondered that night about himself and the ever-present cordyceps was this:

Do cordyceps sleep too?

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed!! If you did, comments are really appreciated :-)!
> 
> I do commissions! Contact me on tumblr if you are interested!


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